PC:Amusing Quotes

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[edit] Forshantir Dreams

wardac: You are giving me a +5 Keen Flaming Burst Dwarven Waraxe, right?
beckmd: In your Forshantir Dreams.

[edit] Pete Giving Away Loot

ferrispc: As a neutral good cleric of a lawful good deity (Heironeous), I find it totally unacceptable that any of us should profit from this while the people of Dormantown and Shorn have suffered so much. I will donate my share of the treasure to the people of Dormantown and Shorn as a meager effort to atone for the sins unleashed upon them by previous adventurers.

[edit] Bisquick wanting to become a wizard

beckmd: Natural 20
wardac: confirm, confirm that shit, crit me mother fucker... crit that shit motherfucker!

[edit] Beck sending over leveled encounters at us

ohlrj: I hate it when he does that, you know he has wood right now

[edit] Rick making promises he can't keep

ohlrj: (6:12 PM) For repairing my bow, I'm not going call you an asshat all night.

[edit] Kladunk Battlemaster (Fighter) on trapfinding duty

Should I stomp again? Maybe I failed my stomp check.

[edit] On Languages

Beck: Do you speak Orcish?
Biscuit: I speak Spanish.

[edit] DM Drinking is Good

wardtd: I was thinking they were trying to make some kind of...baby golem
beckmd: Oh man! I gotta write that down!

beckmd: It takes 30 babies to make a baby golem, and like two weeks

beckmd: Watch out for their vomit attack

beckmd: If you use at least 40 babies, you get the wailing babies special attack

wardtd: What would you do with one baby golem? I feel like you'd need more
beckmd: There are currently strict golem population control laws. Only one baby golem per couple.

wardtd: How does a baby golem stack up to other golems?
beckmd: It would beat the pants off an iron golem. A flesh golem takes any kind of flesh; orc flesh, people flesh, but baby golems are much more powerful.The manual is full of dead baby jokes. If you cast silence on it it goes berserk, if you cast earthquake on it it gets the don't shake the baby attack. It also has a 5% chance of dying of SIDS every round.
scottbp: You have to watch out for its Cloudkill attack.

beckmd: The Order of Night's Breath has been stealing babies. At first, we thought they were making a baby golem, but now we're not so sure.

[edit] Fun With Slang

goodmp: I was looking at a page of noir phrases, and women's legs are "Gateway Sticks"

[edit] Rick on Cocks

Rick: That's actually not a bad looking cock.

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